At school she is progressing so well on her targets but as a little human she’s developing such a beautiful and empathetic character that everyone loves. She’s selfless in her support towards her peers who are developmentally behind and she’s always motivating them and cheering them on as her teachers say. If she realises one of her peers are upset or poorly, she will go out of her way to support them in the way she can. There are days she comes home and will tell me how one of her bus friend's or school friend's have been poorly and will feel really concerned and anxious for them and this goes for her teachers too. She loves bringing home ‘star of the day' awards and at school she eagerly awaits them but if one of her friend receives the award instead, she’s just as happy and she will scream their name in excitement.
I’m not surprised at all because she reflects all these qualities wherever she is. She’s full of love and support for all the people around her. She is like a little mother hen to her brother who also will go to Aleena when he’s in trouble and hold onto her and cry. Aleena's life isn’t about the superficial and material goods, she really thrives on love. Just one little kiss or hug from her brother brings her so much joy and she'll scream in excitement saying, “mummy I think Isam loves me a lot. What do you think? Look he gave me a kiss. He’s such a cutie pie”. I love seeing this part of the bond between the two because it really brings out the joy on her face. All she wants is love and acceptance and this isn’t always easy when you are developmentally behind and cannot keep up with your peers physically and mentally.
I say mentally but I do not mean it as intelligence level. Aleena is extremely intelligent and bright, that we know of. However, Aleena perceives the world in a very black and white way. She’s isn’t into what today’s 9 year olds are interested in. She feels everyone is similar and sometimes doesn’t realise that people are taking advantage of her sweet nature where she will share everything just to be accepted into the fold of friendship. I observe from afar and I can easily just intervene but it always intrigues me how far Aleena will go just to be acknowledged as an equal. She will give up her tablet time so someone else will feel very pleased with her (she does the same with her brother). Sometimes as a mother, I feel my heart breaking into tiny pieces. I find it hard when she feels rejected by children or she doesn’t quite understand what they are playing hence automatically she feels isolated. This is when the realisation hits me that my child indeed is starting to feel different and is asking me questions on why other children do not want to play with her.
We have found her crying a few times on her own because all she wants is to play with other children. As a mother, this is such a difficult journey and challenging for me to answer her questions. I don’t want to tell her she is slightly different in terms of her needs and developments but I also want her to understand that situations like these will arise and I want to prepare her and make her resilient and independent. I could easily cover her with my love and affection but I don’t want to turn her vulnerable and hence we are finding ways to explain to her what to do during these situations.
Aleena finds these rules maybe too rigid because she is just a soft and warm person that wants to offer everyone her friendship and love but as a mother, I have to teach her to stand up for herself and identify when other children are not welcoming her and even being rude to her. She also attends mainstream setting once a week which we are hoping builds her confidence but also makes her understand that we are all different and it is OK to be different.
Aside from her kind side, Aleena is probably one of the most humorous little people I’ve come across. She will sometimes say something and laugh at herself and say, “it's so hilarious mummy” or “I’m so hilarious mummy”. A few weeks ago she went into a chip shop and asked a lady at the queue, “why are you here?” and the lady replied saying she wanted chips and Aleena proceeded to ask, “do you not cook at home?”. It may not sound so humorous but Aleena uses a very sweet inquisitive tone to ask questions. The lady laughed and up to this day, every time I think of it, I laugh on my own.
Another example is when she noticed one of her teacher was expecting and she casually went up to her and said, “you’re going to need to buy a cot soon won’t you?”. The teacher was so surprised and said she couldn’t stop laughing about it later and even asked Aleena to help her make a list of what the baby will need.
This is our Aleena. Full of sunshine and rainbows like the unicorn or ‘nunicorn' as she calls it. If ever anyone is having a bad day, Aleena is sure to brighten up their day and bring a bit of happiness and laughter into their lives. When some family members are feeling sad, they love having a hug from Aleena and they know she will comfort them and make them happy. In a quiet room, Aleena will fill it with her belly laugh and loud giggles. Does she ever get sad? Yes she does but very rarely. Life for her is fun even if that is just visiting Cardiff which she LOVES or her Aunty’s house around the corner. If we have visitors, she’s so excited and will want to know if they will eat dinner at ours as it means they’ll sit longer. This is my beautiful little girl.
I love that she can go to a school where she let’s down her guard and enjoys being there everyday. I love going into these meetings knowing that I’ll always hear Aleena is a happy and confident child in that setting. I’m so glad that Aleena goes to a place where she can be who she is in her full glory without having anyone take her for granted.
We are blessed to have Aleena as she has taught us to be patient and kind to people. It isn’t an easy ride being her parents as there is another side to this beautiful journey but I’d rather concentrate on the positive and happy side. I am glad that we have had this opportunity to start this journey of parenthood with Aleena. We are excited to see how she develops into a teenager and then to an adult and we are hoping the ride gets a bit easier for her health wise and remains stable as it has been for a few years.
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